#30
Social media makes us victims of our own theatrics
Heyyyy hotties! Here’s a little brain dump that consists of my weekly thought spirals. Hope you enjoy and are inspired to think for a few with me :)
Aside from my limited beauty routines and lack of proper makeup knowledge or the fact that my social feeds provide me with just enough information about relevant sports happenings for me to shockingly offer up a regurgitation of the tweet I read earlier to the nearest guy, one of my most significant “pick me” tendencies is that I only really read essay books or narrative non-fiction. Spare me the latest fiction novel everyone can’t seem to put down. I’m obviouslllly above that; let me read my Didion or Babitz-type authors. (I hope you’re catching my sarcasm, as there are a million and more young women with the same mindset as me in this world, let alone the city).
To satisfy that itch, I journeyed into the fabulous essayist and coiner of the phrase “Instagram Face,” Jia Tolentino’s book Trick Mirror. Her essays strategically provide her witty analysis of the constant delusions we’re subjected to as humans in the digital age. It's very much up my alley in all ways, as I’ve written off much of my screen time as my self-proclaimed status as a digital anthropologist. I highly recommend diving into her work as she provides a sobering and realistic lens for understanding the illusions that the internet has magnified.
In the first essay, she brings in sociologist Erving Goff’s concept of the presentation of self. I remember lightly studying his work in introductory sociology 101 theory in school. But through my maturing mind, I have recently approached it with much more sophistication. In short, his theory suggests that the way we function with ourselves and the world around us can be viewed the same as performers in a play. When we’re alone, we’re backstage and not putting on a show, but when socializing to any degree, we are performing some version of ourselves for another's perception. Whether or not we’re aware of it, we try to control others' perceptions of ourselves. While this theory has been relevant since the pre-internet days, it is aggressively relevant now as we present ourselves in person and online.
I was delighted that Jia re-presented this theory to me as I was long overdue for an academic-driven overanalysis of the online world. Undoubtedly, how we present ourselves online is a curated version of how we live. Social media gives us some (primarily false) control over how others perceive our lives. The scenic pictures and perfect lighting selfies we take are ways we can show those viewing our lives a glimpse into the person we want them to believe us to be. Social media has made performing to the outside world and ourselves infinitely easier. Through curating our internet identities, we become victims of our performances.
This is nothing new, and anyone with a conscience knows that what you see online is nOt ThE wHoLe PiCtUrE. But evidently, we will never care enough to step away. With the increasing momentum of our growing online lives, we will continue to ignore the falsehoods and constantly fall victim to the imaginary lives of those around us and our own. Of course, some spend less time on socials, and their thumbs are weaker from less scrolling. Still, it seems like that window is growing smaller as this digitally native next generation finds it more complicated to find their theatrics to only take place in real-life interactions.
Is Joan an OG pick me? (I went to Barnard of course Im reading the Didion and Babitz book)
I have also thought a lot about brands tapping into long-form content. Transparently, when I was initially Substack pilled, I believed that genuine, relevant, and entertaining long-form articles and brand posts were somewhat of a refreshing power move. Yet, now that I’ve sobered up from my Substack glazing, I find this take to be dated and inaccurate. While enriching and genuine content from brands is definitely more appreciated, does that mean it has to be translated into a longer form? Do we really have the energy to engage with expanded branded content? Are our brains not fogged and minds not fatigued enough? This could just be where I’m at now, but I feel like brands should be churning out QUALITY, QUICK, ENGAGING, and SINCERE material if they want to catch the eye of the masses.
Thanks again for sticking with my words as I take you through the journey of my mind! I’m happy to be writing and thinking with you again. I promise I won’t ghost again. Love you always <3
